We are thrilled to introduce you to a dear friend, Holly Pakiam. Holly and Sally are local friends in Colorado and ministry partners to the mothers around them. Holly is married to a pastor and homeschools their four children. She enjoys drinking countless cups of coffee, eating dark chocolate, reading til the wee hours of the morning, taking long walks in the foothills, and merrily observing the outdoor pets that don’t require feeding (deer, squirrels, coyotes and an occasional bobcat or bear.) Holly will be popping in here occasionally to share her heart with us.Hello dear friends of Mom Heart. It’s just starting to look and feel a little like autumn here in sunny Colorado. The leaves have fallen, but we’re still enjoying warm days in our mild fall season this year. My heart is content.
I recently had the privilege of being a part of Sally’s Mom Heart Intensive this past October. A group of over 40 women gathered together in the Clarkson’s lovely home to hear from Sally and discuss aspects of what it looks like to be a Christian leader in our culture today. I’d love to share with you a few thoughts from my time with Sally. In leading a group of women, we are quick to become aware that we are all flawed and sinful people who are aiming to follow after God. We are dearly loved children of God, but we are ‘not yet’ what we will be in the end (1 John 3:2).How do we lead while we remain painfully aware of our inadequacies and shortcomings?What can make leading even more difficult is when others make us aware of our inadequacies and shortcomings! I mean, have you ever left your group feeling a bit discouraged wondering if anyone cares how much time you’ve put into preparing your home for them? Or the investment you made thinking through creative ways to help the group connect? Or how you took the time to bake muffins and scrub your kitchen sink to create a clean and welcoming environment?
Holly with some of the Mom Heart Leadership Intensive women
I’ve realized as a leader, I’m too often affected by discouragement or even encouragement from others. Once a fellow mom and friend shared with me how grateful she was for my leadership and care for her. Naturally, I felt quite joyous, on top of the world, at least for a time. And then the next week, a different friend complained that I’m not available enough - to walk through life with her the way she had hoped. It’s a battle not to feel sad and disappointed when I’ve let people down.Of course we are going to disappoint others. It’s a normal part of life. And it’s natural to feel sad when we disappoint others and sometimes healthy for people to express this sadness to us.How do we move forward and not let those words define who we are?We return to the beauty of the Gospel.
“For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ. 7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.” 2 Corinthians 4:6-7 (NIV)
Your story— with all its flaws and shortcomings— is the perfect backdrop for the light of Christ to shine. Christ in you is more than enough; Christ in you is your hope of glory (Colossians 1:27). In Christ, you have all that you need. The best treasure you could offer is Christ—even if you offer it in a ‘jar of clay’.So…Lead your group with confidence in who the Lord has called you to be. He has created you as a unique woman with a unique calling and a unique personality.Lead your group out of the season that you are in. We’re all in different seasons of life. You may feel like you’re in a season of winter and all you can offer is a place for moms to gather. Lean into that and refuse to let the enemy whisper that you ‘should’ be doing more. Maybe you’re in a season of fall and the harvest is plentiful. You’re newly an empty nester and life has allowed you more space and capacity to invite women into your home on a regular basis.
Lead your group out of your own weakness and inadequacy. Through honesty and vulnerability, people will see the glory of God’s grace.So, lean in. Don't compare yourself to anyone else. Open the Scriptures, listen to His still small voice, and walk in obedience. The Holy Spirit will help you.
Holly's beautiful family